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Man of Ash

from Look at My Van Gogh by Matthew Ryan

/

about

This song is more about how I have come to view myself during this whole experience. I keep trying to find this idea of hope but I never found it and that mindset left me more scarred and torn. It built me up and destroyed me even more. The 2nd verse is from the viewpoint of someone else watching how this experience has changed me.

lyrics

Caught in a web of situations I can’t manage
Prey waiting to be swallowed
I look in the mirror and my skin is black and burned
The flesh sliding off my bones like wax
Playing with fire
Intangible
Unmanageable
The warm light attracts me like these tragedies that follow me
And now I leave a trail of ash
And its covered my footprints

I hold on to these facts that leave me looking at myself dissolving from a different perspective
Look at this skinny pale kid I can look right through him
You can tell he's spent the whole day locked in his head
Asking questions like why is my shadow larger than me instead of asking how to get rid of it
Cause he know he can’t stop its follow
Look at him with his teeth falling out of the mouth that can’t support the words he wants to say
That's why we say

Oh look at the man of ash

credits

from Look at My Van Gogh, released May 16, 2020
matt ryan - vocals, guitar
ben coates - mixing, mastering, sound effects

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Harborer Canton, Ohio

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